Best Donald Trump Jokes & Trolls To Ease The Pain Of His Win

The future looks bleak, and a time of uncertainty lies ahead.

But instead of crying, let’s laugh (or try to, at least) at some brilliant jokes about the new president.

Trump is a joke magnet, with his stupid haircut, questionable track record in business, and string of ridiculous outbursts.

Here are some of the best Trump jokes…
In an interview this morning, Donald Trump said mosques need to be ‘watched and studied’ because he believes they may spread hateful views. In related news, Donald Trump needs to be watched and studied.
— Seth Meyers











Over the weekend, three pages of Donald Trump’s 1995 tax return were leaked, revealing that he declared a $916 million loss from his three Atlantic City casinos. That’s right: Donald Trump lost money on casinos. You know what they say, ‘The house always loses’.
— Stephen Colbert

Here’s the thing about Donald Trump: He never apologises; he’s never wrong no matter what crazy thing he says. He’s the white Kanye.
― Bill Maher

A new study claims the stress of being president takes three years off your life. So suddenly everyone is thinking of voting for Trump.
– Conan O’Brien

Of course [Trump] wants an Emmy. It’s a woman, it’s gold, and it’s proportionate to his tiny hands. It’s basically Trump’s ideal mate.
— John Oliver

People look at the Statue of Liberty and they see a proud symbol of our history as a nation of immigrants, a beacon of hope for people around the world. Donald looks at the Statue of Liberty and sees a four. Maybe a five, if she loses the torch and tablet and changes her hair.
— Hillary Clinton

Donald Trump looks like a plughole in an orangutan sanctuary. His hair looks like a slovenly post-coital cat. He’s probably only running for president because this dimension doesn’t have a Superman he can give a hard time to.
— Frankie Boyle

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